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Happy Tacky Sweater Season

I had something cute to say about the holidays like spending time with family and friends and how Chunky said “Momma, I have two legs and two arms. But I only have one wiener.”

The kid is a fucking genius.

And we can’t forget that we should not let  Jesus steal Santa’s thunder…

…or that is the other way around?

It really doesn’t matter because we celebrate Tim Tebow.

Shawn hates Tim. (if you haven’t read that post you should. It’s epic. Nods to John and Jenn)

I should probably give props to all the people who are baking like bitches out there.

I am one of those.

But I’m baking everything with chocolate.

I hate chocolate.

So I’m not getting fat this Christmas.

But I am going to be spending a lot of time with my family and friends…the people who held me up when I couldn’t stand.

(And that means all of you too, my readers. You have helped me more than you know.)  

That’s what this season is about.

That’s what life, every single day should be about.



Recognizing your blessings.

And reaching your hand out to others in need.

Ok, and Jesus H Christ (but we only go to church one day a year and that is Christmas and we generally don’t pay attention to the mass because we like counting bald heads and tacky Christmas sweaters).

So you see my friends, I intended on writing something cute but I’ve got shit to bake.

On that note, The House Of Chunky wants to wish you a very Merry Christmas.


No drinking and driving mmmkay?





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