I am sure that a lot of you have replayed at least one entire conversation in your mind and thought about all the things you could have said.
Like this one time at a work meeting, our director had informed us that we might have metal detectors installed in the ER entrance. It took but a mere second for my manager to say:
“How far will Kim have to stand away from it?”
Which was hilarious since I have over $50,000 worth of metal holding my spine together.
Now, I can take a joke just as good as Oprah can wolf down a pie, but when it came from my manager, I would get so mad that I could shit out a chair and hit her in the face with it.
I loved her that much.
Since she was the one who wrote my checks, I couldn’t come out and say ,”I put a poisonous snake in your house and it’s probably going to kill you in your sleep.” because that wasn’t professional. It would be minutes after her “eau du fake tanning lotion with a subtle hint of bullshit” scent left the room, when I had thought of a comeback.
“You should ask a hooker to teach you how to walk in high heels because you look like a blind elephant tap dancing down the hall. I heard that your mom was offering classes on the corner.”
But it was too late to tell her (thank God!).
We tend to miss many opportunities to squeeze in that one point, suggestion, fascinating tale, your stance on the topic, or simply remembering to tell your mother in law that it is inappropriate to announce deaths on Facebook.
Who needs to read the obituaries when you can just read her timeline?
Doesn’t it torment you when you’re sitting in your car at a red light, when all of a sudden…WHAM…you think of something you could’ve said?
“Well, I like you more when I’m drunk!” you shout.
And then you laugh at yourself because that was god damned brilliant.
And then you notice the driver in the right hand lane locks his doors and whispers to his kids, “Don’t stare at her.”
The recent tragic event that took place at the capital in Washington DC has been the center of attention in the newspapers, on TV, on the radio, and on the internet. As always, instead of educating the public about postpartum mood disorders, the media chooses to make love to sensationalism and portray postpartum mood disorders in an extremely damaging light.
Was something that unconcernedly shot out of a professional’s mouth on a TV interview.
People hear it, read it, and believe it.
Because, you know, TV is like walking into a library, picking up a book, and actually learning about the true facts.
The media is always right.
But I know what is true…
I wonder if that “professional” is sitting in her car right now observing the women crossing the street with strollers, the woman in front of her with the children in their backseat, and the woman happily chasing their toddlers across the park.
And that’s when it would hit her.
Women with postpartum depression are just like everyone else.
These women are doctors, and nurses, and lawyers, and teachers, and the barista that makes your coffee every morning.
And we are damn good mothers that love our children fiercely.
I hope that she stayed awake that night replaying her interview in her mind and all of the things she could’ve said to educate the public and to defend the innocent voices of victims and survivors of postpartum depression.
“Women with postpartum mood disorders are not monsters.”
“These are the signs and symptoms.”
“This is where you can start to get help and support.”
“To the new moms, know that you are amazing despite the way you feel and think. You are so important to this world and to that beautiful babe in your arms.”
“Know that we are all fighting for you and with you so that you can enjoy life again. And you will.”
“Please reach out for help.”