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And Then She Stole My Donut

When I was in grade three, I had the most angriest teacher. I am sure that she was from the era where children feared ruler totting nuns. We were learning cursive and I had such a hard time with it. My aunt, who is also left handed, showed me that it was much easier to write if I turned the page at a 180 degree angle and it worked. My teacher, however, told me that it wasn’t the proper way to do it. She yelled at me and told me that I was being rude because I would elbow Sarah B when I wrote in that “ridiculous fashion”. She straightened my page and slapped my pencil on the desk.


“You’re staying here until you get this right!” she barked.

My palms sweat as I meticulously traced q’s over and over during recess time. It was exhaustingly repetitious. I just couldn’t do it as perfectly as she wanted it to be. I panicked every time I caught a glance of her out the corner of my eye rubbing her wrinkly angry ugly forehead. The clock ticked louder and faster when I saw the kids congregating just outside the entrance. As the bell rang, she snatched my page, “tsk tsk’ed” me and tossed the paper in the trash.

Before the next recess, I begged Sarah to trace them for me when the teacher wasn’t looking.

I handed in my work with a devious smile, and for the first time in a week (which seemed like an eternity as a kid), I was allowed to play outside. This was just one of many mischievous moments that Sarah and I had helped the other out. Just like any child attached to the hip of their best friend, we swore that we would get married, buy houses next to each other, and have lots of children.


The last time I heard, Sarah was a doctor studying to be a cardiovascular surgeon.

Friends come and go but that bag of cookies you plowed through will stick to your ribs forever.

Or something, something like that.

I’ve had a lot of friends in my life thus far but just like a dusty old fart in the wind, some just never lingered in the room.

How do you like that for a quote on a mug?

Each friendship came with great adventures and oh the things I had learned like drinking does not make you a good dancer…

…on top of a bar…

…in platform (it was cool at the time) shoes.

At each turn in my life, break-ups, late night bar puking, that one time I…never mind, graduations, surgeries, marriages, birth, illness, and so on, I can recall that friend(s) who was there sharing that part of my journey as do I remember sharing parts of their journey.

I may never see or hear from Sarah B, Sarah T, Sarah V, or Vanessa, “the rat”, “petch”, “gumby”, GP, Tool Belt, Blood Barf (Lindsay, who on her first day of clinical, saw blood and passed out), etc.,  and yes, that does make me sad.

Even though our friendships didn’t last, I will never forget the impact that they had.

They opened the doors to new adventures…

…and to new friends.

Betty never said goodbye...and the bitch stole my donut.
Betty never said goodbye…and the bitch stole my donut.

Mama’s Losin’ It


  1. I liked this post….we all have had good friends who’ve impacted our lives, then faded away.

  2. I pinpoint certain times in my life to memories of certain friends too. 🙂

    Also: obviously Sarahs make great friends. Only Saras are better. 🙂

  3. We always have our memories! I’ve been saying that a lot lately. Maybe some friends belong in the past. Sarah sounds like a true friend! Anyone who would cover your homework assignment is a gem, no? That Betty is a bitch though!

  4. People come into our lives for a reason, and they go for another.
    Looking at the friends I had, still have, and probably always will have, is a reflection of where I am in my life (and how old I’m getting).
    Let’s just say – pretty old 🙂

  5. For starters I feel some very lingering gas coming your way from us, Kimberly 🙂 Finally someone explained that turning the page thing! Seriously, I’ve wondered that all of my life. And as far as the 3rd grade teacher…if you’ve ever seen the movie Men In Black…she was an alien 🙂

  6. I do need that quote on a mug. Although Facebook has brought many back to my life and let’s just say I would never have sought them out, if left to my own doing! Your 3rd grade teacher sounds like my witchy 4th grade teacher.

  7. Kat Kat

    I definitely have some friends I thought would be around forever just sort of disappear into the sidelines a bit. I miss them, but it does feel like we were exactly what the other needed back then and maybe that’s enough. Great post!

  8. I had a mean 3rd grade teacher too. I am also left handed and turn my paper. Fortunately none of my teachers in school had a problem with that.

  9. My rotten teacher was in fourth grade. So bad my folks moved me to a Christian School to get away from her crappiness.

  10. It is certainly interesting which friends come and go in your life. The good ones stick around though!

  11. I chalk it up to life happens and people move on.. I have a few friends that i have had for life, besides them everyone else is expendable.

  12. Because I’ve moved so much in life, my friendships have changed a ton over the years. I finally got tired of trying to maintain the long distance ones, and when I moved here I didn’t even bother to make “real life” friends. Once I started planning get-togethers with my blog friends, it wasn’t necessary to bother anymore. lol

  13. I have had some amazing friends in my time and some not so amazing friends. With facebook I am still connected to all of my friends from childhood even my very first best friend from Kindergarten.

  14. I love this post. The bittersweet truth is that it’s a rare friendship that stands the test of time, but that doesn’t make the friendships that come and go throughout our lives any less meaningful or real.

  15. Jen Jen

    I also was criticized for how I wrote as well. I used to use that trick too of tilting the paper. Lefties unite! Another reason to love you. xoxo

  16. You know a lot of people in my life have faded away…and well I figured that is what is supposed to happen. If they were meant to stay, they would have and the good ones in my life have. Great writing! Loved the visual of that nasty teacher and getting your friend to write your “Qs’ for you.

  17. Chrissy Chrissy

    Awww what nice memories of friends 🙂

  18. You made me realize how many people have faded away from my life, those were some good memories that I had with them.

  19. Jessica Peeling Jessica Peeling

    It is sad to lose touch with friends from various aspects of life, but I like to think that someday I could reconnect with them – because whatever we had originally will probably always be there. 🙂

  20. Friends will come and go but the ones that you call true will stay no matter what. In sickness and in health, it’s true that the lesser friends you have as long as they have more values and real friendship at heart the richer you will be.

  21. It’s funny how my best friends from high school thought of that exact same idea: getting married on the same year, buy houses and make children who will become also best of friends as they grow. 🙂 I wonder if that will come true.

  22. No, we don’t stay friends forever, but it’s so nice that we have such great memories.

  23. As a left handed person, perhaps you could answer this question I have that drives me nuts at work: I noticed that most if not all left-handed individuals that fill in their application forms have reversed checkmarks – long line on the left and short line on the right. I don’t get that. It is the exact same hand movement to do the proper short line on the left – long line on the right.

    Is this something you do? If so, why? I could care less how a person writes but when something is written inverted, that’s just off. I mean, a “d” isn’t a “b” even when you’re left handed right?

  24. Great piece. Isn’t it odd how people who we could not live without when we were young become just fond memories when we grow older?

  25. —–Yes,
    everybody we encounter teach us something.
    Some are only here for a season.
    And then you have those “ROOT Friends.” (those that have been w/ you forever & Ever.)
    I have 4 or 5 girlfriends who will be with me until the very end.
    LUV u, Kimberly.

  26. I know I should chuckle at this but I did. I remember learning cursive in the third grade. I was a relatively bright student and didn’t struggle in school. The first assignment I ever failed with writing my q’s. I remember hiding the paper from my parents cause I was scared. I ended up getting in more trouble for hiding it instead of telling the truth and just doing the assignment over.

  27. loved this post.. I don’t have too many friends but I’ve heard that lucky people are those who always have a friends by their side in all situations; but blessed are those who have one friend by their side in ALL situations.. memories are good for keeping 😀

  28. I love this post because it has made me think alot about some of the friends that have come and gone in my life. As a matter of fact I am going to go this weekend back home for a very brief visit and am meeting a very, very old friend for drinks and I am so excited! I mean like friends from the 2nd grade through the end of her first marriage! I’m so looking forward to seeing her and catching up!

  29. Reminds me of my school friends. We swore we would be friends forever and I couldn’t tell you where they are now. It’s sad but yes I do remember them and they had as much a part to do with who I am as I did with them. I hope they remember me as fondly as I remember them.

  30. Maria Oller Maria Oller

    I had so many friends at school and I’m so lucky my best friend is been there for me for over 25 years.

  31. I have many friends that I thought I would always know and yet somehow either I left them or they left me. I have a handful of lifetime friends. I am grateful for that, but I would really love to talk to old friends gone, but not forgotten. Sorry about your donut.

  32. Liked these personal blogs so much….and someone once said that we can true friends on one hand…I never believed that,if you saw any of your old crew today,you could sit,have a coffee and catch-up a little at a time…a good friendship may fade but will never die.

  33. I so loved this article, such a sweet lesson to learn or remember. People ebb and flow throughout our lives getting us through the good times and the bad. Always great memories to think about those moments in time and the friends that were there along with us.

  34. It’s so hard to maintain long distance friendships. It’s worth it for sure, but it does take effort.

  35. You speak truth. So many friends that I thought would be forever friends. Yet, they don’t even respond to a Facebook “hello.” Hello, best friend from forever ago? I saw you post something yesterday. Oops. Nevermind. Kids, jobs, etc., took us different courses. No sense lingering in the past.

  36. You’re so right, I have some friends that I thought would be around forever and left me as soon as I moved to another state.

  37. Haha, farts in the wind huh? Great read. Thanks for sharing. Hilarious and great tribute to friendship.

  38. Ann Bacciaglia Ann Bacciaglia

    I am left handed and I often write with my notebook turned 180 degrees. Great post. True friends are a God send.

  39. Kristen Kristen

    Some people do fade away….( but you can always see what they are up to on Facebook)

  40. I have one friend who I always thought would be there, and for a while she wasn’t. But once we became ‘of age’ we reconnected. I wish we had never got separated but sadly life happens. Both our parents got divorced, we moved. It sucks…. I even blogged about childhood friendships awhile back.

  41. I’m also left handed, that’s how my mom taught me.. When I was little, I also would write from the right to the left on paper, I thought it wasn’t fair that right handed people could see as they wrote, I wanted to too.

  42. “I’ve had a lot of friends in my life thus far but just like a dusty old fart in the wind, some just never lingered in the room.”

    I heart you. So very much 🙂

    And yes. I have been feeling a bit nostalgic about this myself lately… Also, what the hell with your teacher, man?! I wish eternal diarrhea upon her.

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