Exhaustion is when the remote is resting on the top of the dresser but you’re way over on the other side of the room.
Like you’re probably only two feet away.
And you’d rather endure watching the 1970’s game show marathon than lift your heavy sorry carcass off the bed.
I was over the holidays before they had even started. On a scale of one to ten my anxiety was a “Turn up Lady Gaga to drown out Christmas music”.
I was a “Stand in front of the crackers in the grocery store for 15 minutes because ‘which crackers go best with the dip I just made?'”
Do you know how many crackers they make? I’m going to ruin Christmas if I pick the wrong ones. I had sent a “S.O.S” picture of the many boxes of crackers to my husband who then asked me:
“Are you f**king high?”
I destroyed the cookies. I made nipple cookies.
I’m not even lying. I missed the baking powder or soda or was it the butter? I don’t know but they came out looking like diseased nipples.
They tasted just as good as they looked.
I was exhausted before the holidays had even started.
Then they actually happened.
Too much food happened and the simple act of putting on pants became torture.
Exhausted is not even a big enough word to describe how tapped of energy my entire being feels.
And here we are, watching – no, staring at 1970 game shows.
The game show host asked the contestant about his life and the man said that he’s a happily married man with two kids. He said that his wife is “Charming.”
Shawn busted out laughing. “Charming? Who calls his wife charming?”
“Charming meaning she’s hit menopause and she’s growing a squirrelly beard. But she’s still nice though.”
We started laughing. He slid his hand under my shirt and pulled me in close, his stubble getting caught in my hair. It didn’t take him long to fall asleep there – our breaths in sync.
I wish I could drift away into dream with such ease, but like most nights, I stayed awake while my babes sleep.
2016 – Whether it impacted you directly or indirectly, this is the year no one is coming out unscathed.
I can’t flip on the T.V or the radio or open a newspaper or engage in a conversation without hearing something awful about this year.
I live in a world of worry every mother loving day but I tell myself that there is good in this world. I do trust in that because I try to be that good that the world needs.
And I know there’s more of me out there who tries.
I – we teach our son the same.
Respect, kindness, compassion for all regardless of what colour you are, what you look like, where on the planet you were born, what you believe in, who you love…
We are all trying to do the same things – live our best life.
And life can be hard. We all need each other and this year, more than ever.
We’ve had our share of funk in 2016 but there’s been so many things that have shone so brightly — when I look back, I don’t even want to see the funk anymore.
It was his first year playing travel hockey (Select 7’s (2015/16) and as an AP for the AE team and started for the AA’s in August of this year). He tells me “Mom, I can’t believe this is my life. This is hockey life.”
I love watching his happy.
2. Our trip to Toronto
I LOVED this vacation. Like LOVED it. Didn’t love the bill but LOVED the people watching, the walking around getting lost in construction, the food, the Maple Leafs game. All of it.
3. Sometimes my Irish shows and I like to drinky drinky and meety meety new people
4. Chunky Monkey’s Last Day of School
This moment – destroying his agenda book.
He was bullied all year by his grade two teacher.
This. Is. Freedom. This. Is. Happy.
5. Mud Cousins
My brother, his fiance and my nephew came down to visit. Chunky Monkey and my nephew went out in the backyard…unattended. Couldn’t be mad. It was both hilarious and adorable.
6. Rib Fest
7. Colour Run – Night
I am super good a fitness…fit – ness beer in my mouth.
I walked the colour run like a pro.
8. Buskers Volunteer
Now my Chunkster shocked the hell out of us when he volunteered out of the blue to take part in a Buskers act. He did so wonderful. The Busker actually PAID HIM!
and Coach Dad in plaid.
Our final year with this league and Coach Dad Shawn and son went out with two silvers.
10. The Dryer
This is the beloved dryer that sits in our drive way. Chunky shoots pucks at it practically every single day. I actually love the sound. The dents in my garage and missing hunks in my siding makes me giggle. Chunky Monkey was featured in Ontario Minor Hockey Association’s website newsletter for completing their 5000 puck challenge! He worked incredibly hard all summer!
11. Our Camping Trip
We went somewhere new. It was beautiful.
12. The Great Peony Massacre of 2016
Chunky thought my flowers were dying because they were drooping and touching the grass so he cut them…all of them. He was so proud of himself for helping. I couldn’t be mad.
I just put them all in the house in every container I had.
My house smelled like death to Shawn – he’s allergic.
I still crack up thinking of it.
13. Shared Birthdays
These kids were separated at birth – just by like twenty one years.
PS. I totally made that cake and cupcakes – I’m for hire.
14. When your wife is an introvert/husband dislikes your neighbor’s dog
You build half of a fence. I just about died when I heard a chainsaw one morning and saw my trees falling down. Shawn had enough. I laughed so hard. It has solved so many problems. I love my half fence.
15. Renaissance Festival
It was hot as balls but it was so much fun…and weirdness. It was my kind of adventure.
16. Christmas Miracles
He’s 12 going on puppy thanks to a toy from Santa. He takes it everywhere!
He also pooped in our house on Boxing Day.
Going through my photos, I have so many more to share. It fills my heart.
Those are the things I want to remember of 2016.
I hope that 2017 brings you joy.
Find what makes YOU happy and do it for all the days.
And surround yourself with people who love you –
Who truly love your weird.
Those are the people who will stick by you through years like 2016. They won’t question you on things like why you are the way you are but will ask important things like:
“How did we ever make it out alive with any eyebrows?”
To you, my awesome readers – friends- as always, thank you for joining me on this wild ride. You’re the best.
I look forward to 2017 – flipping that calendar with flare and awkwardly oversharing my moments with you.
Writing makes me happy so thank you for all your support.
ps. Party safe